A Battle For My Love. Or My Bat Mitzvah Invitation.

I'm proud to say I have NEVER cheated on a boyfriend before. I have, however, made a mistake that is debatably worse than cheating.

In 4th Grade I sat at a desk in a group of four. Me, another girl, and two guys. I happened to have a crush on both guys in my group. So I went on crushing on them through fourth and fifth grade. I was boy cray-zeeee, but despite what I thought was obvious, my flirting went unnoticed by these two Romeos. (I realize that this still happens to me quite a lot. The unrecognized flirting, not the sitting at desks.) 6th Grade rolled around and I lost touch with one of the boys, while the other still had no idea I wanted to have his babies (in a non-sexual way or whatever is appropriate for eleven year olds).

This is how I went to school ONE DAY and one day only, in Fifth Grade.
I had just taken a full head of cornrows out and thought my hair
looked nice like this. This may have had something
to do with the unrecognized flirting. 
Let's admire my LTD2 sweatshirt.

At the end of 7th grade I finally started dating a guy I had been crushing on for...months. Let's call him Armageddon. A week into our oh so something relationship, I was at my brother's hockey game (for those of you that know my brother, let the laughter commence) and one of his teammates was the 4th grade hottie I lost touch with. We will call him Sparta. Sparta also happened to be my new boyfriend's BFF. Oh snap. 

After the hockey game I get home to find an IM (romantic!) from Sparta saying he's had a crush on me since we were little. What did I do? I confessed my undying crush for him, too! "But I'm with Armageddon now", I said. And after what felt like a long conversation, but was probably only a few minutes, I had convinced myself to break up with Armageddon (via IM, of course) and date Sparta, but we'd keep it on the DL for a little while. 

Well in middle school time "little while" apparently meant a few days. Or one day. I really forget. 

THIS. IS. SPARTA.

Since Sparta and I hadn't been friends in years, I hadn't invited him to my Bat Mitzvah, which was days away. Yes, that is correct, I broke up with one boy 6 days before my Bat Mitzvah and then started dating another. Well my parents told me I could not invite Sparta so last minute. I started crying and said it was unfair for me not to be able to invite my boyfriend. They finally agreed. Sorry, Mom and Dad, that was really horrible of me.

Looking back I realize two things. One, I was a total brat. Two, I made a mistake in being such a beyotch to both of those boys. I don't know what either of them are doing now, but we're still Facebook friends. 

I talk to the other 4th Grade boy once in awhile (he is no longer in 4th grade, if that was unclear). He may never know that I wanted to marry him that day in elementary school...even after he threw up in a box.