"Bite Me, Blondie!"*

What do you do when it's 100+ degrees outside and wayyyy too hot for the trusty decorative scarf? You "show it off!" as Joan so confidently advised me. Brilliant. Seriously. That's actually a really good idea. Doing the model strut/walk down the street but instead of showing off your high end fashion sense, you're saying "Look at this artwork on my neck, yo! I got some! Sucks for you, seeing as you gots no pretty marks to show for yourself."  

But what if you can't show it off? What if you're game to hit on someone -- someone who did not decorate your neck so beautifully? How exactly do you avoid that awkwardness? I have no idea. No idea at all. It's all a big messy situation that I'm ashamed to admit I've been a part of. Crap. How the hell am I supposed to successfully flirt it up all the while sporting another guy's teeth marks?

After I wrote the above paragraphs I took a break because I didn't know where this was going. That night I went to a bar with some friends where I was hit on, despite my "flaws". I've come to two conclusions. One, those guys were dumb. Or two, they saw the marks, assumed I was a grade-A slut, and wanted to get in on the action.

Now I've come to this conclusion, a week after writing all of the above. Don't hook up with someone just for the sake of hooking up. It's not a good idea. Fun. But not a good idea.


*Yes, this is from "FRIENDS". What else would I quote?