I Can, However, Blame A Guy For Not Trying...

Last night I was talking to David. We hadn't talked in awhile and tried to fit a few weeks of happenings into an hour. I talk a lot. It was difficult.

Anyway, I was recounting my recent babysitting adventures during which a number of things occurred. Most notably was the hour I spent picking up a ball, while making pirate noises, that the ten month old continued to drop because he liked the noise. So he was all flirty. And as all babies do because they just...do, he kept giving me a devilish smile and then grabbing at my chest.

Upon telling this to David, he responded, "I didn't know you let just anybody do that! You should have told me that!"  No. David, dear, you try without being asked. He he said, "oh well, can't blame a guy for trying." To which I quickly grabibbled (I couldn't think of a good synonym for 'said' so I made up a word), "true, but I can, however, blame a guy for not trying.

I feel like we always (sometimes) like the guys who don't like us. And the guys that like us are the ones we are...well, less than attracted to. So on a recent trip to visit college friends I made what I thought was a reasonable request to a guy...I wanted to snuggle. And he turned. me. down. Turned me down like bed sheets. Except I was in the bed and he was on the other side. And he was like "awww, no. No, bed sheets. I turn you down!" Say whaaaat?! I was so angry.

What he actually said was "I literally cannot move right now." LIAR. YOU ARE A LIAR. Turn over and spoon me, please and thank you.

I wanted to snuggle. That's all! I just LOVE snuggling. WHY WON'T YOU SNUGGLE ME? 

I'm still a little bitter, apparently. So telling David this the next day sent him into uncontrollable laughter. I did not laugh. "Guy is oblivious," grabibbled David. Thanks, Captain Obvious.

David then maneuvered his way into bed with us (probably appropriate to mention that this was David's bed. He had been at work, thus the reason we slept in his bed.) trying to snuggle us both. It was the threesome I never wanted to have. I said that out loud. It was awkward. So I gave myself an award. I try to applaud myself for my awkward moments.